In life, whenever things don’t go our way, we inevitably feel disappointed. For example, when work doesn’t receive the expected recognition, hard work doesn’t get the deserved reward, studying hard but not getting good grades, friends not keeping their promises, family not offering help when needed, seeing many doctors but still not getting cured, etc. These situations can make us feel disappointed with others, ourselves, the institutions, and even God. When disappointed, we might blame ourselves for not being good enough, question why God doesn’t listen to our prayers, feel angry at others for not keeping their promises, or feel that all efforts are meaningless and all demands are extravagant, feeling lost in life; or anxiously searching for other lifelines. Although disappointment is a natural mindset, stemming from the gap between objective circumstances and expectations, we all know that this negative emotion is not beneficial to a person and does not help solve problems or improve situations.
We have been reciting two bible passages about “disappointment” that can help Christians face disappointment correctly and powerfully. “For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again; but the wicked stumble when calamity strikes” (Proverbs 24:16). The previous verse actually talks about the relationship between the wicked and the righteous here. “Do not lurk like a thief near the house of the righteous, do not plunder their dwelling place” (Proverbs 24:15). The “righteous” in Proverbs refers to those who fear God, which can also refer to Christians. Conversely, the “wicked” are those who do not fear God. Verses 15-16 mention that the wicked harm the righteous, and the righteous seem to fall because of this. Such things are common in real life. As Christians, we choose not to follow the principles of non-Christians or oppose their actions to avoid offending God, resulting in the other party’s dislike or even harm. Do we feel disappointed with God because of this? It seems that God did not see the sacrifices we made for Him, otherwise, how could the “wicked” harm us? Proverbs tells us that God is faithful. Although the righteous may fall more than once and be harmed by the wicked, this is all under God’s control. When the time comes, God will say “Enough!” and protect the righteous from further harm, making us rise again! At the same time, God will deal with those who harm us, causing them to fall into calamity. We all dislike falling, suffering losses, being harmed, and being knocked down, but every time we stand up from a fall, we can say that this is the time we experience God the most. In times of disappointment, God still has His wonderful plans for us. “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts’” (Isaiah 55:8-9). The biggest difference between Christians and non-Christians in facing disappointment is that we know we still have a reliable Heavenly Father taking care of us, and the current disappointing situation is not real disappointment, but rather the wilderness we must go through to reach God’s promised land. This belief is not self-deception and rationalisation, nor is it positive thinking, but firmly believing in God’s promises and seriously believing in the word of the Bible. Conversely, positive thinking and self-deception and rationalisation are based on the wrong foundation of self-belief.
“The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance” (Psalm 16:6). Actually, what God wants to give us is not just the best. The previous verse says, “Those who run after other gods will suffer more and more. I will not pour out libations of blood to such gods or take up their names on my lips. Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure” (Psalm 16:4-5). God Himself is our inheritance, our portion in the cup. However, sometimes Christians, like the world, want to get the things that the world fights for. Naturally, when we can’t get them, we feel disappointed. This does not mean that Christians cannot have promotions, more wealth, bigger houses, honours, etc. These worldly benefits can also happen to Christians, but all these are distributed by God Himself. “To the person who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge, and happiness, but to the sinner, He gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God” (Ecclesiastes 2:26). Of course, as recipients of God’s grace, we have the obligation to use the grace we receive to serve God and build others. “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked” (Luke 12:48). Psalm 16:4-6 tells us that God has given Himself to us as our inheritance. The New Testament also says, “He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all—how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:32). God has already proven through the death of Jesus that He will love us and take care of us without reservation. Therefore, whenever we don’t get what we want, we don’t need to be overly disappointed. Instead, in times of disappointment, we should reflect on our life’s direction and motives to ensure we are walking in God’s will. “Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior” (Habakkuk 3:17-18).