My mother is a devout Christian. However, as I was educated in the educational system of China, this setting also meant that my friends around me were also atheists. I feared that if I were to be a part of a Christian church, my friends would make fun of me. This caused me to reject my mother’s numerous invitations to attend church. From that time onwards, I never really thought deeply about the Christian faith.
When I came to Singapore, I realised that many people around me were Christians. Due, however, to the influence that I had since young, initially, I still rejected the Christian faith.
Ever since I came to Singapore, I realised that I no longer enjoyed the freedom I had back home as I often had to look into various matters on my own. Gradually, I face much pressure in everyday affairs and learning. I wished I had someone in whom I could confide but did not know with whom I could do that. One day, with an attitude that just wishes to give it a try, I came to church. I entered into a church that was solemn. When I together with many brothers and sisters sang Christian hymns, this amazing melody brought relief into my heart.
As the church prayed quietly together, my heart that had been feeling tense for a long time seemed to receive peace and steadfastness.
From then on, I attended church weekly. I had never before until then attempted to know the Christian faith so deeply. This Christian faith also seemed to contradict the atheistic beliefs to which I tried to hold on. This caused me to struggle for some time.
Later, as graduation approached, I was faced with the harsh reality of getting a job in Singapore. The first few letters of my curriculum vitae that I mailed out later quickly increased to several hundred letters. The eager expectation with which I opened the letter box every morning was always met with disappointment. The number of responses to my letters was a fraction of the letters I sent out. During that time, I was feeling very miserable. But each time I went to church, brothers and sisters showed concern for me. Sister Chen Ming also cared for me, and told me that brothers and sisters are praying for me weekly. At that, I was very touched. Pastor and the brothers and sisters around me also often urged me to entrust this wish for a job to the Lord and that He will help me. From that time on, I began to entrust this wish to the Lord and also gradually prayed to the Lord. Further on, God seemed have heard my cries, and like a miracle, I received an opportunity for a job interview. Needless to say, I especially treasured this opportunity for an interview. From then on, I prayed even more frequently, and learnt to entrust this wish to God. This desire to entrust my wish to God had never felt so strong. Finally, just two days before my tour visa expired, I was accepted by the company. I was so happy. But the first thing that I remembered to do was to give thanks. I thank the church pastor for his listening ear, for the prayers of brothers and sisters. Above all, I thank God for His greatness.
Later, with the recommendation of Pastor Tan, I attended the Basic Bible Class. Pastor Tan’s five lessons of the Basic Bible Class, and his patience resolved my various questions that stemmed from my misunderstanding about the Bible. It was this that helped me have a wholesome and systematic understanding of God and the Bible. It was precisely then that I realised my hesitation in following God, and my doubts about the Bible were such a pitiful mindset. I then steadfastly believed in the existence of the Lord, and eagerly await my baptism and being God’s follower.
I thank and praise the Lord. I am a sinner. The sins I committed before the Lord, I am ashamed of them and am unable to raise my head. I really do not deserve the love of God. But God so loved the world, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16). I also sincerely hope that by God’s calling, more and more people, friends who have yet to put their trust in and depend on the Lord, to come and join this big family.