Some weeks ago, some of you may have read of a sad piece of news: a young boy left home.  In the course of trying to escape out of the house, he climbed out of the window and fell to his death.  Besides some of his personal belongings, the police found in his bag a photograph of his family.  It could be that the boy had wanted to leave home, yet he also felt that he would miss his family and so took the family photograph with him.  I do not know what led the child to want to flee home, but this incident should remind us of two things.

First, the Bible reminds us: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Eph 6:4).  I understand that as parents, we want to see our children become useful people.  Hence, we discipline them when they misbehave, set high standards and expect and steer them to achieve these high standards.  We should train our child to be useful people as the Bible instructs us parents: “start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it” (Prov 22:6).

That being said, however, God’s Word also reminds us not to “exasperate our children” (Eph 6:4).  We need to understand that as much as children have an untapped potential to achieve great things, every child also has his or her limitations.  Hence, not everyone can score straight A’s.  I do meant that hence we can relax their training but I’m saying that when a child has done his or her part, albeit not perfectly, let’s be generous with our praises and rewards although they may not have met our desired expectations.  To ask for more, that is, when it is beyond their ability to achieve is to “exasperate them.”

Let’s be always sensitive to the emotional needs of our child.  They are more fragile than we think.  The world around us and our children is a pressure cooker where only the fittest survive.  Make the home a place where the wounds of our children can be healed, and where discouraged hearts can be refreshed.   Our children need such a home.  Hence, the next time when you are about to discipline your child, cushion your discipline with sensitive love and encouragement.  Where possible, every rebuke must be accompanied by love’s healing.

Second, children are not the only ones who need encouragement.  We adults also live in a world that is very abrasive.  Only the smartest, prettiest and most capable survive.  When you are not capable, life can be a real struggle.  May the church be a place where tired hearts find rest.  I urge you, as people of God, be kind and gracious to one another.  Be forgiving.  We have been unlovely many times, both towards our family members and also towards other children of God.  But our Lord did not reject us but forgave us our sins and loved us despite our failings.  The Lord has been kind to you.  Therefore, you should be kind and merciful to others too.

Has someone said something unkind to you?  For your Lord’s sake, forgive him or her.  Have you been unkind to someone?  You need to be reconciled to him or her.  Is there someone who is rejected by many in your office or even in church?  Be kind.  Reach out to him or her with Christ’s love.  “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy” (Matt 5:7).